Judging by these two movies that Netflix released for the Christmas season, Netflix’s stance for 2020 is “Christmas movies that don’t actually have anything to do with Christmas.” I wouldn’t be particularly surprised if Holidate was inspired by that song by The Waitresses. That’s how important Christmas here. Weird for a Christmas movie. Anyway…

Sloan (Emma Roberts) is a young woman who is basically tortured by her family every holiday due to her frequently single status. Jackson (Luke Bracey) is tired of spending holidays with women he feels the need to impress. The two of them come up with a scheme to be each other’s dates for every holiday. Her family can stop trying to set her up with men and he can be himself. It’s a perfect arrangement!

Before I start picking this apart, I want to say that I didn’t hate the movie. Emma Roberts is kinda cute as Sloan. Jessica Capshaw plays Sloan’s sister, Abby, and she is also a bit of a delight. While it would have been nice to sit with the characters for a bit longer than one day every few months, the core idea of two people promising to always be each other’s date isn’t terrible. It’s like a backup plan. “Hey, if I don’t have a date for Memorial Day, go to this picnic with me.”

With that said, there are some holes here. We literally only see these two interact on or slightly before each holiday. And I mean every holiday. If there is a party associated with a holiday, they are celebrating it. We see them at New Year’s Eve, Valentine’s Day (though they hadn’t made their promise yet), St.Patrick’s Day, Easter, Cinco De Mayo, Fourth of July, Labor Day (which doubles as Sloan’s brother’s wedding and they actually bring separate dates), Halloween, Thanksgiving, and…well, almost Christmas. It’s difficult to imagine them really forming a good relationship when they are only talking like 10 times a year. Especially when they spend a good portion of those holidays fairly drunk.

I also don’t understand why Sloan’s family is so interested in her love life. According to the story Sloan tells Patrick at New Year’s, she had recently broken up with her boyfriend that had cheated on her. At the beginning of the movie, it’s Christmas and her mom is harassing her about being single. WTF Lady. Give her some space.

There’s also a lot of gender stereotypes going on. Sloan will say something like “Men are emotionally distant”; Jackson will reply with “Well, women are clingy!” and they will have that conversation multiple times with different stereotypes. Neither of them are that stupid.

Oh, I almost forgot about Kristin Chenoweth’s role. She plays Sloan’s Aunt Susan. She is the one that gives Sloan the idea of the “holidate” as she always brings a different man to each holiday gathering. However, instead of just being a man she can hang out with, she brings a guy she can drape herself all over. I’m tired of seeing “slut” characters in movies. Susan could have easily brought a different man to every holiday and behaved herself like an adult instead of literally twerking in the lap of someone half her age. I don’t know who thought her character was a good idea.

Finally, the movie is kinda raunchy. That’s fine and it has its place, I’m not sure that this is the place though. As I said, Aunt Susan is literally sleeping with every man she brings to the gatherings and she’s not quiet about it. She straight up tells Sloan gritty details about her sexual encounters. If you are averse to cursing, let me warn you that Sloan curses like a sailor. (I have no problem with it but some people might.) To the point that she eventually stops herself from dropping the F-bomb because children are near. There’s a lot of drinking and a little bit of pot smoking too. I don’t think it’s anything super terrible but it might turn some people off.

As a whole, I enjoyed Holidate. I didn’t cringe away from anything. None of the characters were unbearably annoying. But it also wasn’t a great movie. I think I might have liked it better if we saw Sloan and Jackson talking a bit more in between the holidays or even a few days before some of the holidays to see them figuring out their plans. As it is, there is actually a moment where Jackson FaceTimes Sloan and she says “This isn’t a holiday, Why are you calling me?” If I was giving this a rating, it would probably be like a 3 out of 5. Watchable but not memorable.